Helping Your Child Fight Study Stress
What do you do when your child starts doing badly in school and frequently dishes out complaints such as:
"I hate school."
"School is so boring."
"My homework is too difficult."
"There's too much work to do."
"I don't like my teacher."
"I feel sick; do I really have to go today?"
"I'm not going to do the work. I don't care."
At first glance, you might think your child is just whiny, lazy and having a bad attitude. However, if you take time to dig deeper into the problem, you might discover that such complaints are underlying signs of stress. It is a sad reality that study stress is now prevalent among children even as young as preschool age.
What are the contributing factors to study stress?
1. The times have changed and the world has become very competitive. Having straight A's in school does not guarantee a place in a university anymore. The standards have been raised resulting in parents pushing their children to be better and smarter.
2. Exam oriented education systems. The education system now has increased workload and content compared to before. There is much to learn and much to do in so little time.
3. Overly hectic daily schedules. Parents enroll their children in countless tuition classes, enrichment classes, music classes, art classes, dance classes etc.... Children are chauffeured from one activity to another with hardly time to rest, to play or just to be with family.
4. Parents putting extremely high expectations on their children because they believe it reflects their parenting skills. Isn't it true that society grants a higher status to parents with successful children?
5. Children are told to study hard but have not been taught effective study skills. Neither have they been equipped with the necessary skills to handle stress.
There are many ways study stress affects children. It is advised that parents pay attention to the signs of study stress that may emerge in the following three areas:
1. Physical.
Stress is known to weaken a person's immune system. Therefore, the child may be more susceptible to falling sick. He may also frequently experience stomachaches and headaches.
2. Behavioral.
Be aware when there is increased anger, tantrums or aggressiveness. The child may also start to bite nails, stutter, or twitch. He may also become an antisocial. Some may even resort to smoking, drugs or alcohol.
3. Mental.
Stress may lead to the child having a mental burnout, depression or anxiety.
So how do we combat study stress? What can we do to help our children have a more positive educational experience?
1. Provide children an environment that is conducive to learning. Their study area needs to be well equipped with necessary materials and stationary and free of distraction such as toys, video games or television. The place should also have good ventilation.
2. Increase their fitness level through games, sports and exercise. Children will have a higher tolerance to stress and better concentration.
3. Teach them some stress management skills like physical relaxation techniques.
4. Encourage positive thinking and positive self talk. As parents you should also be more positive with the children. Be generous with praise, help boost their confidence, be encouraging and take time to listen and empathize.
5. Help them develop effective and efficient study skills. For example, teach them how to be effective note takers such as mind maps and flow charts. Teach them a revision method that goes along with their learning style.
6. A healthy balance of study and play. This would include teaching children to exercise time management skills. Parents need to accept that there are benefits to allowing children free time to play.
In a world that demands more of your children, may you be sensitive to their challenges. Do not add to their existing stress but adequately equip them to manage and adjust to it. Help them find the joy in learning and in so doing, bring out the potential that lies within them.
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